Monday, 29 August 2011

challenge number 2

I succeeded in challenge number 1. Also during the weekend I managed to stay calm, I didn't yell of got angry and even we had some terrible weather this weekend it was good. I have that idea that the kids are listening better (I only have to ask things 3 times instead of 5...), they are more cuddling, more open. I'm really amazed by the effect. I was setting this challenge because I didn't feel good by the way things with the kids were going. But now I know that also the kids probably weren't feeling well.

This morning (getting ready for school is always a challenge and at some point something is going the way they want and one of them will get a mood swing). This morning it was the eldest and she was screaming and kicking is the middle of the street. But we had to go to school in order for not being late. I stayed calm, didn't yell back, but reflecting on it, I could have listened more for why she was feeling this angry and communicate about solving it later. I will work on that.

So up to challenge 2: getting a more healthy food habit and losing some weight!

A few years ago I lost a lot of weight by setting myself to a stick eating regime for about 10 weeks. De years following, the weight didn't come on again. But the last few months I'm eating too much of bad stuff like chips, chocolate, candy, cookies and drinking soda's with too much sugar. So, a few pounds are getting on again. And I want to stop that process now. So in order for that I will follow my food regime for the loosing and keep attention of what I put in my mouth. Asking myself if what I want to put in my mouth, is it good for me of not? So my goal is to loose about 9 pounds and after that keeping the healthier food intake!

My question for you: how do you resist eating the bad (but o so nice) food intake into proportions?

have a nice day, smile and be kind

Thursday, 25 August 2011

This helps

I don't know if this is because of the blog or because I'm doing things more concious then normal but I stayed calm again. Yesterday during dinertime the kids were tired. The youngest one played with the plates and one ended up on the floor...broken to pieces! He was shocked by it and became quiet and timid. I told him I wasn't happy with what he did. He said sorry mommy. I cleaned up and we had dinner, with a good eating boy. Also the bedritual went with fun and happy talking last night.
I really feel good, calm and happy with the way things are going. The strange thing is that I don't even feel the anger anymore in a stressfull situation! I hope I can keep this up, it makes life much easier, more effective and most important thing happier kids.

This first challenge is a succes so far.

I'm still curious how you are handling difficult situations with your children?

have a nice day, smile and be kind

Tuesday, 23 August 2011


day 2 challenge 1
Even yesterday evening, after al long day at work, I managed to stay calm en understanding with my kids. I cared and cuddled and let them to out their feelings of the day. But in they end they still have to do what we want them to do. It is not that they can freeride! But at some point I didn't open my mouth and let them figure out things themselves.
I hope to get a balance in teaching them how the world works and what is expected from them and in letting them figure out from trying.
So today I started really early and will see my family again after work.

have a nice day, smile and be kind

The first post

I start this post so I will be able to tell about my efforts to make life as good as possible and to document my steps, succes and failure in my weekly challenges.
But also want to share about the little things in life and things that are importent to me.

This week challenge will be:

Don't go grazy when my kids don't do what I want them to do, but stay calm and realize that there is a deeper reason for why they are reacting this way. Yelling won't help getting them done what I want!

I yell too easily to my kids: especially in the busy moments of the day, like in the morning getting ready for school or in the evening, when everyone is tired. I feel bad about it, about not be able to control myself, about scaring my sweet wonders and about the fact that yelling isn't helping.
Yesterday I read an article about mindfull parenting. A woman with the same issue as me. Explaining that her yelling is caused by stuff, like tiredness, stress etc. So does the behaviour of the kids; their not listening is also caused by other stuff, like tiredness, stress or morningmoods etc. So when I feel getting angry I will take some deep breaths and stay calm.

This morning it worked! I stayed calm and that felt good. I asked my girl after she got calm if she didn's felt angry anymore? She told me no and did drink her milk and ate her breakfast!
This felt like a little personal victory for me. I hope that, with focus, I will be able to do this all week so it will get my new habit to stay calm instead of getting angry and yelling.

Do you have advices for me? How do you handle situations when your kids don't listen but you really want them to do something (like eating, showering, drinking, sleeping etc)?